You’ll hear losers say that “girls only go for douchebags” and they’re absolutely right.
I should know. I’m the douchebag these guys are complaining about.
For the first few years of my dating life I listened to the advice that most people will give when it comes to attracting women. “Be polite. Open doors. BE. A. GENTLEMAN.” I did everything a good boy does and got myself a decent looking girlfriend.
I got the girlfriend that every nice guy gets.
-The one who is always late to scheduled dates with you.
-The one who always seems to win every argument because she cares less than you do.
-The one who will say she needs “space”.
-The one who will rarely initiate conversations with you. She’ll always be “busy”.
-The one who wants to “take things slow”.
If you’re reading this and nodding your head along as I list off these qualities of the special girl in your life, I’ve got bad news for you bud…
She doesn’t really want you!
Sure, she can “tolerate” you, but there’s someone else she really desires. Whether it’s a man she actually knows or just the idea of a certain type of man, it isn’t you.
This man that she really desires is nothing like you. You would never guess that she would want this man because he is so unlike her. Your girlfriend will never admit to wanting this man and she’ll never admit to what she’ll gladly do (or what she has already done) with this certain man.
Who is this man, you ask?
You can call him an asshole. You can call him a douchebag. You can call him a dick but your girl will be calling him to come over and have sex when she gets bored of you.
“Not my sweetie pie!”
Yes your sweetie pie.
And whether she gets bored of you next week or at the end of high school, if you’re a young guy, she WILL get bored of you.
She’ll blame you for something. She’ll say you were too rude. She’ll say you didn’t write her 20 love letters and only 19. She’ll say she needs to go off to college to “find herself” but none of it is true.
The real reason is that you just weren’t smart enough. Let me explain.
Men are strong. We break things. We fix things. We run things and we fuck things. We dominated the first part of human existence because everything was physical and based largely on simple power. We never had to focus too much on social interactions. If we wanted things, we took them. There was no trickery involved.
Where men were strong, women were weak. Where men were weak, women were strong.
Now we live in a society where it is against the law to take. It is against the law to hit. A weak man in the city has few disadvantages compared to a strong man in the city outside of a bar fight. (Things are different out in the sticks. Manly traits are still revered in some places.)
We have largely moved away from a society that celebrates the natural advantages and strengths that men usually have and have moved towards a society that celebrates the social and psychological/manipulative traits that women have naturally acquired over thousands of years of evolution.
“No hitting. We use our words”. Well, women know how to use their words and they use them well.
Because of this, evolution is a bitch and she is laughing at you. When you start out dating women as a young man, you are already behind.
You are less socially developed than other women your age and will be tricked into becoming a nice guy that finishes last until you finally wise up.
You need to understand this. She is smarter than you when it comes to emotions and relationships. She is tricky. She is cunning. She sees things that you don’t. She knows how to play the game and it is the reason she gets away with murder and you’re left wondering why. And she’ll never admit to any of it because that’s part of the game too.
This is what I mean when I say that you weren’t smart enough. You’re a guy. You are honest and have a good heart. You just want a good girl and you want to love her. You wish things were simple but they just aren’t. The truth is that it is all a giant game.
There’s a reason they call some men “Players”. In reality, we are all in this game and a “player” is just a guy who is winning.
These guys are not magic. They are not lucky and they aren’t blessed by God. They are smart and that’s all there is to it. They know about the game and they know the rules inside and out. They probably pity you for not understanding the game but they know you’ll eventually figure it out someday. I know for a fact that I feel a little bad for the nice guys when I’m banging their girlfriends.
(aka: why women love douchebags like me)
Women love douchebags because douchebags are socially intelligent. Their social intelligence allows them to display value and power in ways that women are attracted to. Plain and simple. These smart men know the rules of the game and they play to win. You don’t think they’re smart? Why can’t you get what they have then? They pretend to be dumb because that’s the smartest thing to do. There is simply no way to win consistently unless it is done with intention and skill. Below are the things that players know that you, unfortunately, do not. There’s good news: You’ve found this site and it will help you turn yourself into the badass player that gets everything he wants out of life because you are going to learn the rules and how to win.
Never ask a woman what she wants
Asking a woman how to get women is like asking a deer how to hunt deer.
–“Excuse me Ms. Deer, I’d like to shoot you or one of your friends. What’s the best way to hunt deer?”
–“Thank you for asking, Mr. Hunter. The best way to hunt deer is to leave a bunch of food scattered throughout the forest, put up “no hunting” signs and then hop in your car and head a hundred miles away. There’s no better way to catch a deer. Trust me”.
–“Gee, thanks Ms. Deer. I’m gonna do that right now!”
*deer laughs with her deer friends and enjoys the free food*
Women will tell you that the way to her heart is to scatter food all through the fores…err I mean buy her flowers and chocolates. It is important to understand that you should stop giving women what they say they want and rather give them what they RESPOND to. That is true with every “relationship” you have in your life. If you’re a boss and your employees tell you how they “want” to be managed…If you’re a salesman and people tell you how they “want” to be sold…you are probably being lied to. You should never give people what they say they want and rather give people what they respond to. You are a hunter. Your prey is whatever you want. Don’t ask the prey how to hunt itself.
Do you see why women want you to be the nice guy? This is exactly what happens. You are being the dumb hunter scattering free food and then leaving when you do what women want. It is a giant joke and your kind behavior is the punchline.
How to give women what they’ll respond to
Women are people and all people respond to value and power. Here are some important ways women will judge you and determine your value and power in different scenarios.
Do you worry about things that happen or are you unmoved? Are you stressed about life or are you carefree? Being indifferent is one of the best ways to show that you are a valuable man. When you learn to be relaxed in nearly all scenarios then people will look up to you and they will look down on the guy who cares.
This is especially true with women. A player will always care less than the girl he is trying to get. He understands that communication and language is a tool and he uses it to send messages.
Here is how a player sends the message of indifference. A player
- Gives attention to other women
- Won’t ask questions about the girl that would reveal much interest. Questions usually relate to the availability of the girl because all he cares about is what she can do for him.
- Doesn’t respond frequently and doesn’t initiate much either.
- Will poke fun at the girl without worrying about offending her.
Social proof is how cool someone appears to be. Do you have lots of friends? Are they popular friends? If you are a young man, social proof means more than money. This is because most of her life at that age will revolve around being social. Once she gets out into the real world without mommy and daddy’s money, she’ll suddenly realize how she was always attracted to Rob, the guy who coincidentally makes 130k a year but has a “great personality”.
Back to social proof. A woman will gauge your popularity and “coolness” by looking for signals that will give her clues about your social status.
She will look at your friends. She will look at how you dress. She may even look at how many social media followers you have. She’ll want to get a sense of your social circle. As a young guy, having a quality social circle is the best way to get laid because it comes with the social proof that young women value and the utility of having access to more popular women that you know.
Here is how a player will artfully pass the social proof tests. A player will
- Never reveal he is lonely or not busy seeing people. He always seems to have something to do on Friday night whether or not he actually does. (although he usually does have something to do)
- Focus on being social and will never turn down an opportunity to flash the fact that he is hanging out with girls or with other cool guys. He will never make it obvious, but if you check his Instagram there will be a healthy dose of good looking and popular people in his pictures with him.
- Attends parties to leverage himself in a better position to make friends with these popular people and will become more like them.
“That’s not true. Not everyone takes pictures with cool people because it’s strategic. They do it because they’re just having fun and enjoy taking pictures!”
All I can say is that I was a loser. I changed and then banged more girls in two years than a small group of average men will likely collectively bang in their entire lives. So, uh…whatever you say.
Women are drawn to masculinity the same way you like big tits. We could talk about the evolutionary reasons for this but at the end of the day, you like big tits and girls like a MAN.
Has a girl ever tried to get you to wear makeup? Please, for the love of God, tell me that you didn’t say yes.
If you did, there’s precisely a 0.00% chance that you impressed her with your masculinity. However, when you are young, masculinity is less impressive than indifference or social proof. The reason it is still relevant for a young man to be masculine to get women is because women can tell how you’ll be in bed based on your masculinity. If you’re a limp-wristed bitch, you’ll have sex like one too. I can shake your hand and tell you if I can take your girlfriend from you or not. Sometimes not even that much is necessary.
Players will still show their masculinity and rarely waiver from it. The young guys who have the most sex are the guys who embrace their masculinity and
- Have cool hobbies such as sports and shooting guns
- Have athletic and muscular bodies from said sports
- Stand tall with good posture and strong body language; not covering their mouth with their hand or turning their knees in when reaching down to get something
- Have a strong voice and speak with conviction
- Maintain eye contact
- Show emotional control and maintain a level head; not losing their shit like a little girl
- Social proof
Those are the three main things that women look for and respond to when determining the value and power of a young man.
Women want opposition, stress and excitement
Simply put, women want a fast man. They want a man with an edge. They want someone to call them on their shit and someone who might just leave them behind if they can’t keep up with them. They want someone who has the audacity to tell them to pay for dinner and make demands.
To be honest, I couldn’t tell you exactly why. It’s like gravity; we can only study its effects.
Learning how to become the player who actually gets laid
may will take a lot of learning and mistakes. Personally, it was a lot of trial and error in the form of “I wonder if she’ll be attracted to me more or less when I insult her? Wow, I guess it worked. Let me try again. Wow! Like a charm!”
Many will say that this is misogynistic or “hateful”. The truth is that there is only what works and what doesn’t work. The only prejudice and bias that I have is for things that work. Doing what doesn’t work because it fits your
personal group’s opinion of what is good or bad is the hallmark of an idiot and a loser.
Here is the simple reality: if you are unwilling to do what will work, do not complain about what you are doing that doesn’t work.
If you read this article and continue to complain that women only go for douchebags but you refuse to do anything about it, you are a loser. You aren’t “going your own way”. You’re a loser. Losers deserve to lose and that’s why we call them losers. Learn the lessons. Make the changes. Stop losing.
You’ve spent enough time being the nice guy. It’s time to become a player.